================================================= Expat Worlds Monthly Digest ================================================= May, 2002 Vol. 4, Issue 4 .....IN THIS DIGEST..... ==== THE STORY =================== (Compliment from the Expat World Newsletter) -=A Holiday in Hell - Nevada=- ==== EW SPECIAL ================== -="The Paper" for the 21st Century=- ==== HUMOR, TRIVIA, NEWS AND MORE... == -=Trivia=- -=News Story=- -=Traveller's Tales=- -=Jokes=- ==== THE RESOURCE TIP ============= -=Pricelessware=- ==== INSIDE THIS MONTH EXPAT WORLD == -=Table of Content=- ==== THE STORY ================================== A HOLIDAY IN HELL -- NEVADA Editors note: This article was presented for publication by a member of Expat World International Press Corps -- Larry Waldo. You too could be a card-carry press correspondent and begin a freelance career. See end of this article for details. I entered Nevada about 15 miles south of Lake Tahoe. In a fly-in trip a few years ago to Las Vegas, it so turned me off that I had no desire to go to another den of iniquity, glitzzy, plastic city . Previously, I was told that "Tahoe" is a really nice place and not at all like Las Vegas. But I shall never know for my first stop in Nevada was Carson City. Carson City was just about the most nothing little city you could ever hope to zip through. It's the state capital, but mostly it was just Pizza Huts and gas stations and cheap looking casinos. I didn't stay long. I soon headed out of town on US 50, past Virginia City and towards Silver Springs. This was more or less the spot on "Bonanza" where the map map used to burst into flames. Remember that? It has been many years since I've seen Pa and Hoss and Little Joe and the mean one all living in a landscape that was fruitful and lush, in a Western, high chaparral sort of way. But out here in the same real area there was nothing but cement-colored plains and barren hills, and almost no habitation at all, neither man nor fowl. Everything was gray, from the sky to the ground. This was to remain the pattern for the next two days. It would be difficult to conceive of a more remote and cheerless state than Nevada. It's a state glowing in the dark from the massive amount of spent nuclear materials stored there and having a population of only 2 million in an area about the size of Britain and Ireland combined, Almost three-quarters of this population is located in Las Vegas and Reno, while most of the rest of the state is effectively just empty. There are only 70 towns in the entire state - the British Isles have 40,000, just to give you some comparison -- and some of the 70 towns are so remote as to be hidden from most peoples' view. For example, Eureka, a town of 1200 in the middle of the state is 60 miles in any direction from the nearest town. Indeed, the whole of Eureka County has just three towns and a total population of under 2,500 -- and this in an area of a couple of thousand square miles. I drove for a while across this emptiness, taking a back highway between Fallon and a spot on the map called Humboldt Sink, where I gratefully joined Interstate 80. This was a cowardly thing to do, but the rental car had been making odd noises off and on for the past couple of days - a sort of faint clonk clonk oh god help me for I'm dying of clonk disease -- which wasn't covered in the troubleshooting section of the owner's manual in the glove compartment. I couldn't face the prospect of breaking down and being stranded for days in some godforsaken dust hole waiting for an anticlonk device to be delivered to a local gas station cum repair shop, on the weekly Greyhound bus from Reno. If I hadn't chickened out and gotten on Interstate 80, the nearest alternative would have been Highway 50, that would have taken me 150 miles out of my way and into Utah. I wanted to go a more northerly route across Montana and Wyoming - the Big Sky country. So it was with some relief that I joined the interstate, though remarkably empty - usually I could see one car in the distance far ahead and one in the distance far behind. Considering this highway is the main artery across the USA where, indeed, with a sufficiently capacious fuel tank and large controlled bladder, you could drive the whole way between New York and San Francisco without stopping, this highway was desolate. I spent the night in Wells, Nevada, the sorriest, seediest, most raggedy-assed town I've ever seen. Most of the streets were unpaved and lined with battered-looking trailer homes. Everyone in town seemed to collect old cars. They sat rusting and windowless in every yard. Almost everything in town appeared to exist on the edge of dereliction. Such economic life as Wells could muster came from the passing traffic of 1-80. A number of truck stops and motels were scattered around, though many of these were closed down and those that remained were evidently struggling. Most of the motel signs had letters missing or burnt out, so that they said, LONE ST R MOT L -- V CAN Y. I had a walk around the business district before dinner. This consisted mostly of closed down stores, though a few places appeared still to he in business: a drugstore, a gas station, a Trailways bus depot, the Overland Hotel - sorry, H TEL - and a movie house called The Nevada, though this proved upon closer inspection also to be deceased. There were dogs everywhere, sniffing in doorways and peeing on pretty much everything. It was cold, too. The sun was setting behind the rough, distant peaks of the Jackson Mountains and there was a decided chill in the air. I turned up my collar and trudged the half-mile from the town proper to the interstate junction with US 93, where the most prosperous-looking truck stops were gathered, forming an oasis of brightness in the pinkish dusk. I went into what looked to be the best of them, the 4-Way Cafe, which I gather took its name front the fact that it consisted of a gift shop, restaurant, casino and bar. The casino was small, just a room with A couple dozen slot machines, mostly nickel ones, and the gift shop was about the size of a closet. The cafe was crowded and dense with smoke and chatter. Steel-guitar music drifted out of the jukebox. I was the only person in the room who didn't have a cow boy hat on, apart from a couple of the old craggly-faced women. It was absolutely, in my opinion, the worst food I have ever had in America, at any time, under any circumstances, and that includes hospital food, gas station food and airport coffee shop food. It even includes Greyhound bus station food and Woolworth's luncheon counter food and high-school cafeteria food. It was even worse than the pastries they used to put in the food dispensing machines at the Daily Messenger building in Homestead, Pennsylvania and those tasted like somebody had been sick on them. This food was just plain terrible, and yet everybody in the room was just shoveling it in as if there were no tomorrow. I picked at it for a while - bristly fried chicken, lettuce with blacken veins, french fries that had the consistency and appearance of albino slugs -- and gave up. I pushed the plate away and wished that I still smoked. The waitress, seeing how much I had left, asked me if I wanted a doggy bag. "No, thank you," I said through a thin smile, "I don't believe I could find a dog that would eat it." I went back to the motel feeling deeply hungry and unsatisfied. I watched some TV and read a book, and then slept that fitful sleep you get when all of your body is still and resting except your stomach, which is saying, "WHERE THE HELL IS MY DINNER? HEY, LARRY, YOU LISTENING? WHERE THE HELL IS MY EVENING SUSTENANCE?" ==== EW SPECIAL ================================= FREE FREE FREE "THE PAPER PT" FOR THE 21ST CENTURY SECRETS REVEALED - Live a life free of government interference. Information your lawyer won't tell you even if he knew. Get your money out of the country before your country gets the money out of you. All can be done via the "PT" manner and philosophy as prescribed by the late, great, W.G. Hill. This book takes "PT" one step further by not necessarily voting with your feet but using a "paper highway" instead. Freedom and privacy is possible in the 21st century with this book.. Our newest book is NOT FOR SALE. The ONLY way to get a copy of the 109 large-page PAPER PT is to subscribe to the of the EXPAT WORLD newsletter (2 year sub) or renew your present subscription for two more years in the next 60 days. We will send you the PDF format file via email with the complete book on it. It's readable on line or print it yourself for reading at your leasure. So cutting to the chase, this book is yours free if you subscribe to the Expat World newsletter (2 year sub). Subscribe today to the Expat World newsletter. Be sure to mark it: "The Paper PT Sub". ==== HUMOR, TRIVIA, NEWS AND MORE... ================ TRIVIA Cookie; freebooter; a nitwit; a sloop; how come; sleigh. What European language were all or most of these English words borrowed from? A: Dutch B: German C: Russian D: Danish Which of these was not a technological advance made or invented by China? A: The wheel B: Gun powder C: Paper D: The magnetic compass (Anwers below) ----- NEWS STORY An Austrian circus dwarf died recently when he bounced sideways from a trampoline and was swallowed by a hippopotamus. Seven thousand people watched as little Franz Dasch popped into the mouth of Hilda the Hippo and the animal's gag reflex forced it to swallow. The crowd applauded wildly before other circus people realised what had happened. ----- TRAVELLER'S TALES HIGH SPIRITS: Bangkok authorities are looking for living relatives of a well-known ghost. They want to hire them to relate the story of an unquiet spirit to tourists floating past the haunted area on pleasure boats. Mae Nak, a young woman of Phra Khanong district, is believed to have died in childbirth while her soldier husband was away on duty in 1869. But so possessive was she that she rematerialized, determined to keep other women away from her husband. On his return, she greeted him--and he didn't realize that he was sleeping with a ghost until he later caught her using her magical powers, such as stretching out her arms to impossible heights. The tale will be told by people with "kindred ties to the 19th-century ghost," The Nation newspaper reported. ----- What do you call a female art teacher that doesn't shave? .. a hairy potter ----- "I don't make jokes; I just watch the government and report the facts." - Will Rogers ----- There was a little guy sitting in a restaurant, minding his own business when all of a sudden this great big dude comes in and -- WHACK! -- knocks him off the stool and onto the floor. The big dude says, "That was a karate chop from Korea." The little guy doesn't like this, but he gets back up on the stool and begins to mind his own business again when all of a sudden -- WHACK! -- the big dude knocks him down AGAIN and says, "That was a judo chop from Japan." So the little guy has had enough of this... He gets up, brushes himself off and quietly leaves. The little guy is gone for an hour or so when all of a sudden, he returned. Without saying a word, he walks up behind the big dude and -- WHAM!!!" - knocks the big dude off his stool, knocking him out cold!!! The little guy looks at the surprised waiter and says, "When he gets up, tell him that's a crowbar from Sears!" ----- TRIVIA ANSWER Cookie; freebooter; a nitwit; a sloop; how come; sleigh. What European language were all or most of these English words borrowed from? The correct answer: A (The Dutch equivalents are : koekje ; vrijbuiter ; een niet-weet ; een sloep ; hoe komt het ; slede) Which of these was not a technological advance made or invented by China? The correct answer: A (The wheel was invented in Mesopotamia) ==== THE RESOURCE TIP ============================ PRICELESSWARE The Pricelessware List is the compilation of the favorite Freeware programs of the readers of alt.comp.freeware. Programs are available in the following Categories: - BUSINESS - DESKTOP - FILEUTILS - GRAPHICS - INTERNET - MULTIMEDIA - SECURITY - SYSTEM - TEXT Check it out at: http://www.sover.net/~whoi/Priceless.html ==== INSIDE THIS MONTH EXPAT WORLD =============== EXPAT WORLD NEWSLETTER (VOL.14 ISSUE 5) Table of Content: - Five Flags to Freedom - Bits and Pieces - Are you Being Conned? - Go Ahead and Make Money, Viets Told - Tax Scam - France: Its claim to Fame - Home to the King of Farts - Expat World's World of I.T. - Expat World's World of Travel - Know Your Airline Seat - A Holiday in Hell - Nevada - Around the World with Expat World - The Swiss and Their Taxes - Tourist's Visting Europe are Getting Ripped Off - On the Singapore Scene - Boobs and Tbbes - State of the Union Address - The Armchair Investor - An Expat Financial Site - A Traveler's Tale - Are You a Third Cultured Kid? - International Snips and Clips - How to Profit on the War on Terrorism - Reunite With Your Lost Travel Friends - A Tale From The Old West - The War at Home - Crapper Rapper YOU MISSING SO MUCH Each week the EXPAT WORLD DIGEST gives you just a smattering of what you can find in the EXPAT WORLD newsletter that we produce once a month. Why not get the whole story and subscribe now to our electronic version for just US $30 per year. Go to our website: www.expatworld.net to sign up. ********************************************************************* EXPAT WORLD - the newsletter of international living FREE Trial Subscription at http://www.expatworld.net/ URL - http://www.expatworld.net Email - office@expatworld.net ---------- End of Expat World Digest -------------------------------- To unsubscribe, write to unsubscribe-digest@expatworld.net